I can’t remember what got me thinking about fatalism all of a sudden – but then isn’t it how this stuff always happens? Here you are, savoring your mid-morning cup of coffee, looking out the window, still half-awake, contemplating what the day is going to bring, when bum! – something sends your mind into the spiral of thinking about a matter unrelated to anything in particular yet entirely captivating, so much so that you actually care to write it down.
Anyway, fatalism is a topic for a much deeper philosophical scrutiny perhaps – or none at all, perhaps – but I find it hopelessly intriguing. Am I in control? Is there really, truly anything about life that I can change or turn my way? I mean look at all these people who are trying so desperately to control something, anything. Their longing for control, likely rooted in some primal sense of insecurity, is overwhelming - and no part of life has escaped it. You see it on a global scale with the human race changing the face of the planet to the point that it no longer resembles itself; in politics with the powerful nations attempting to mold the rest of the world to their convenience; in families with parents seeing to it that their children grow up happily clung to the ‘true’ values. You see it in every man or woman thinking to be in charge of their careers and their relationships; in every dieter or fitness fanatic; in every anti-aging product commercial; in every comedy show that tells you when to laugh. Oh yes, I remember now what got my mind going on the subject: the everyday life I see around me, pure and simple - all of it.
There is a good book on fatalism – maybe the best one there is on the subject. It’s called “Sleeping Beauty.” Ever felt this stubborn uneasiness about the fact that the King and the Queen just couldn’t prevent what was going to happen to their daughter, despite their best efforts? Worse even, has it ever troubled you that their very efforts to prevent the evil curse, to change the fate, seemed to have been precisely what eventually made it materialize? To this day, I remember being restless about that annoying inevitability despite all the magic and the romance and the sweet happily-ever-after package that serves as the perfect capsule to deliver the you-can’t-change-what’s-coming message to a young mind – early enough for the child to have the rest of her life to get used to the idea. If only, I thought. If only they had tried harder. It kept reoccurring to me that somewhere along the way, something could have been done differently that would have changed everything. I realize now, or at least I hope I do, that nothing could be done; and besides, could something be done, there would be no story to tell.
You choose your own path in life, you would argue. You find it comforting to view life as this huge decision tree with lots of branches sticking from each node: extremely complicated yet orderly, not chaotic; challenging and stressful, yet manageable. Some of your moves are wise, some are stupid – but the matter is, you view them nevertheless as your choices, the fact you take much pride and relief in. You pity those other folks who seem to just go with the flow. As for yourself, you navigate your life. You are in control, in the driver’s seat, at the steering wheel.
Looking back at your life path, it does seem that you have had lots of choices. You see the entire palette, and on that palette your unique path is distinctly highlighted, gleaming sometimes in proud, sometimes in shameful colors. Wow, you think – just look at how many different ways my life could have gone. The fact of the matter is it didn’t. And therefore, it couldn’t. There is some ultimate fatalism in the fact that from the moment you are born there exists absolutely no way for you to make a set of choices different from the ones you are going to make, no matter what you do. And whatever you say, this small stubborn piece of fatalism is there to stay.
So what’s the point of all this rubbish? My bottom line is, relax. Relax truly, deeply, fully; and embrace your life and everything it brings. Yearn to live the life that will be, and no other. Welcome just what’s in store for you. For it is going to be good no matter how bad things may get at times; no matter how many tears you shed and how much grief you have to weather – it is going to be your life. Live it. And remember – fatalism is a good thing.