first you party, after you feel depressed,
after - you feel indifferent and that's all.
I would probably love to feel something completely else
but I think that's not possible any more.
how many events are there between "what's up?"
and a textbook example "you mustn't cry"?
Cannot count.
I finally grew up sharp
as a knife.
But inside I know: the only thing I want
is to be in safe, to be small and warm.
from the open window - evening chill
on my face...
at this moment you realise you are made of steel
and you've lost your faith.
29 nov 15