there is sometimes you feel like shit. it doesn't depend on how old are you or where are you come from. it gets to you uninvited and unexpected. it can be one day, one week or a month. it can be several of them - doesn't matter.
how we get rid of this feeling? we usually run away from it. trying to cover it with some other feelings.
so, there was a day i felt like shit. and the only thing i wanted to do is cry. just because i needed to. i didn't know what was the reason or why, because the day before i felt good and definitely okay. so i called my friend and he told me we can meet in cafe near my house. so i dressed up and went downstairs to the cafe. he was already there, drinking cup of coffee and in front of him was a cup of coffe for me. so i sat down and started to warm up my hands with it, staring at the brown liquid. "what happened?" and i just looked up at him and said "i don't know". then i started to cry. again: because i needed to. so he just smiled and asked me "have you ever felt like sun". i'm telling you, i was staged. i was looking at him and thought "have i?" he smiled with teeth "you are so much of a sun, that you just had to rest and let the rain come for a while". "i'm tired" i said, and he answered "i know, i felt like this before. like shit. like there is something inside your chest that comes to your throat and doesn't let you be you" "exactly". i looked up at him and i felt good. he made me feel good.
"i love you"
"yeah, but you have to stop crying and let me kiss you".
i know this story is so much of original stupid things. but also it's a story of how my four hour depression was rescued by him. i still love him.
and the person who can make your shit-feeling GO AWAY is so much better than the feeling, that is opposite to the shit-feeling that can only COVER it.
seriously, find your person. it can be not a person for whole damn life, but it will be a person for the best days of it.
love always, me.